You weren't supposed to fricking leave.   You were supposed to say:



Hey let's work this out.

Hey, c'mon now.

yea, we have problems, let's find a solution.

Let's talk.

 I love you and this isn't going to break us.

 We're in this for the long haul, don't give up.







 Anything but leave.


You promised that this was "it".



Why did you leave?
 Why did you just quit?
  Was it that easy?   
   Do you hurt too?





This hurts so fucking bad.

Stop it, just stop it.

Craziest thing happening. Before the controversy over the Confederate flag began I hadn't seen one in years. But now? Everywhere I go I see them flying. On private property, flagpoles, cars, everywhere.

Folks, we can't wipe out history. If we did, we'd render ourselves helpless against learning from our mistakes. And for some, the harder someone tries to repress history, the harder others are going to fight to keep it. And then WWIII will start...within our own borders.

Slavery is part of this country's history. Just as indententured servitude, child labor, Japanese internment camps, and more are a part. Should we become part of England again? Because if we wipe away the last 155 years of history, we might as well make it across the board and wipe it all out. Forget the American Revolution and our ancestors beliefs of a free country.

I can speak with an English accent if I work at it.

Can you? 

Do you want to?

Being a single parent is hard but that's ok.  As long as you know you are going it alone, it's just a matter of prioritizing and keeping on a pretty predictable schedule.

But when you are in a relationship and it feels like the other parent has checked out, then you're a single parent but with a partner who may or may not give input...and you never know they will give input.  It's impossible to make a schedule or if you do and just do your thing, then they get pissed off because you didn't "ask" them.

It's kind of like walking on eggshells all the time.  You don't know when they like or don't like a decision you've made and if you point out that you asked for input and they didn't give any (btw, NOT giving an answer implies agreed consent to whatever I decide), what do you do?

I sure miss my partner.

It's 6 years later and I've been a bad bad blogger.  But such is life.  We lose track of things and later find them and it's like a new toy all over again.

So quick recap.  Retired, moved to a sunshine state, Mick and Mack are now 8 year olds going into 3rd grade this fall, a teenage stepdaughter, and pseudo fiancee.

I say pseudo because we are having trouble blending our families.  Take twins who have never been separated and an only child who doesn't like to share her daddy and...well....squares don't fit into circles and vice versa.  I hope we will work it out but the air in the house is so thick that sometimes I can't breathe.

 I've made lots of friends the last few years, some good, some not-so-good, and some great.  I've kept the great ones and say hi to the good ones.  The not-so-good are now not-friends.  Much easier that way.

Hills, valleys, plateaus, and deep canyons make up life.  Sometimes you know you're in for an easy hike and other days that small hill stands before a deep canyon and you have to decide which way to take - the easy or hard way.  

So no one is going to read this because I've been gone so long but that's ok.  I just need an outlet and this is it.

How I spent 9/11 ten years later.

How I spent 9/11 ten years later.

9/11 is the day my generation will never forget. Every generation has at least one and I have two: The Challenger exploding and 9/11. I'll never forget where I was both of those days.

I woke up at 5:30 this morning and had cereal waiting for my boys when they got up about 6:30. We watched cartoons together for about half an hour and then they went to their playroom while I tried watching one of the memorials. At 7:46 EST they called for a moment of silence. Then in the midst of the silence I heard the sound of children laughing.

That's when I realized how I needed to commemorate 9/11. With my family and friends. Not sitting on the couch crying. I couldn't bear listening to all the names, I just couldn't.

We had been planning on painting our house for several weeks now. So friends came over, we all put on old clothes and started painting. We laughed, we talked, and we listened to my boys laughter as they climbed trees, rode their bikes, and played in the pool.

We celebrated life. Because no matter how hard "they" tried, they can't stop us from celebrating life. 

And this is my last transfer post.  Now I hopefully won't lose all my posts because some of them make wonderful memories.

Yeah, I really do suck at blogging. But that's because there has been so many changes in my life.

Life EXPLODED. Notice the all caps? That's cuz it was a level 5 explosion and everything changed.

I had a great job, nice house, family all living together on one street and one person's decision changed it all.

I'm not going into details, because they suck and make me bitter. So let's just say that after the explosion dust settled...

I quite my job. 

I moved my family.

I started over.

And everything is 150% better.
We have a beautiful home. Home, not house.
I have a wonderful job that I totally lucked into.
My kids are in a GREAT school.
And I'm nowhere near the explosion site.
Can't ask for more than that.
I'll try to do better from now on blogging. Life with twins is an everyday wonder. And I want to share the beauty of it.

Ok, I suck at Blogging but here's why...

Ok, I suck at Blogging but here's why...

Sometimes there is just too much going on in a person's life and not enough time to sit and write about it.

Family emergencies crop up.

Health problems blast out of nowhere.

Family members get on their high horse and need knocking down.

Work is overwhelming.

or...

Life is just too damn busy at times.

September was all of the above for me. About the only thing in my life that hasn't exploded or imploded are my kids...and that's just a matter of time.

So...

I'll be back later with more chit chat.

Twins + Sharpie = BAD

Twins + Sharpie = BAD

So my twins found a blue sharpie marker.

The sharpie marker found...

The chaise
The carpet
Their legs
Their arms
Their face
Their hands
and their hair...

TwinMommie - 0
Twins - 1

*picture taken after scrubbing them in the tub*

He quit...

He quit...

going to the potty.

Mack, aka Baby B, was doing so well potty training. Then he quit. He refuses to pee in his potty. He will walk around in pain until you put a pullup on him and then...voila! He goes. In the pullup.

Mick, aka Baby A, goes all the time. He's PROUD of going in his potty! He pees and then he brings the insert to me. Of course I praise and smile and laugh. And it makes him even prouder.

I'm going to start giving M&M's to Mick everytime he goes. Let's see if that kickstarts Mack into going again when he doesn't get M'ies too.

Anyone ideas out there to help?

Saturday August 9, 2009

It's a first! They actually went to bed on their own!

No asking.
No pleading.
No begging.

Just crawled into bed and said "nite nite".

A day for miracles.

A day of miracles.

Phew and it's almost 5 months later

Phew and it's almost 5 months later

How time does fly! I could have sworn that I'd posted since March 17 but there goes that DMS again...

So last night I'm giving the twins a bath and Mick (that's baby A aka older by 1 minute) lays down and on his belly is this HUGE horrid sickly looking green bruise. I lean down to look closer....and....

No, he didn't pee on me.

He has bruises running up his thighs too.

So I call my mom, who keeps them while I'm at work, and ask her if he had fallen. She said no, and I told her she needed to come up here and look and these huge honking bruises.

So she trots on up here (it's like a 1 minute walk) and looks him over (no he didn't pee on her either). He's not in any pain, it's not sore or anything. And we're both perplexed.

Then we see the pullups.

Hmmmm.....

Yep, the ink on the pullups had sweated all over him while he was outside playing!

Maybe I need to check and see if they were made in China.

Dressing myself...

is one of the hardest things I've had to learn since retiring from the Air Force. See, I'm used to wearing a uniform. I get up in the morning and the only thing I had to think about was...wear my hair french braided, ponytail, or bun.

No worries about what to wear, if it matched, or looked good.

Cuz I'm sorry, no matter how great your body is, you just can't tell in uniform.

Sorry folks. That's an urban myth.

Ok, back to dressing myself.

Now I live in the civilian world. High heels, dress pants, nice shirt, hair, makeup, etc. All that jazz.

I used to think that I was good at dressing.

I've learned that I'm not.

This morning I got up, looked in my closet, and decided to wear black pants with a nice black shirt.

Guess what?

It didn't match.

Nope, sure didn't.

You can't wear a black tweed pant with an off black shirt. It doesn't work.

Did you know there are different shades of black? Now blue, yeah, blue has different shades. So does pink, and green, and red. But black?

Who the hell knew black could really be not-black?

Then I realized it was St. Patty's Day so I found a shirt with green in it.

Now, what to wear tomorrow...

And it's finally Friday.

Thank goodness.

I hate the time change.

Scratch that.

I hate the spring forward time change.

I don't like losing time.

However it's doing wonders for my boys. They get to stay up later (they think) and they sleep a little longer (I think) in the morning.

I like to get up early, like 5am on the weekends. Why, you ask? Because I get an hour of quiet time before they wake up.

An hour to:

Drink coffee
Smoke a cigarette (yes I smoke, don't lecture me)
Relax
Play a game on the computer
Get their cereal ready
Get their sippy cups ready
Wake up.

An hour to myself that doesn't come but once a day if I'm lucky.

Then they wake up.

And the excitement begins.

Because everything is new again to them. They love watching Mickey Mouse Playhouse on DVD. They sit with their cup of cheerios and sippy cup of milk and ooh and aaahhh over Mickey and his pals. They jump up and down and laugh like they have never laughed before.

And I clean up cheerios.

But that's ok.

Because the joy on their faces means the world to me.

I still don't like the time change.

But for them...it's worth it.

And the boys want to do nothing but play outside!

Which is great for letting them run off their energy.

But did you know that two year olds have boundless energy?

They do.

Really.

Lots and LOTS of energy.

We get home at 6:45 pm. We get out of the car and immediately they run for their playhouse. Arms full of groceries and other crap (you moms know what I'm talking about), keys held between your teeth, and trying to call the boys to come inside.

Not happening.

Drop everything on the stairs and start chasing! Which is kind of hard to do when you have a gravel driveway, high heels, and two active little boys.

Finally get them inside 20 minutes later, go outside to gather up everything you dropped and see the contents of your purse spilled everywhere.

Finally get inside only to realize you can't find your keys.

Toss your hands up in the air and go watch Mickey Mouse with your kids.

Hear them laugh, giggle, and scream out when something excites them.

Feel them cuddle up next to you as you all watch and enjoy the snuggles.

A perfect end to a hectic day.

Ok, at one point I decided to create a 2nd blog and now that I'm much smarter I know I can barely keep up with one, much less two.  So I'm combining.  These next few posts are what I put over there and don't want to lose so bear with me.

When I was pregnant with my twins I watched Discovery Health Channel like it was the ONLY channel on TV. One day a show came on called "Yummy Mummy". Of course I just had to watch it.

It was all about just how yummy you are after you have a baby.

Boy was I disappointed.

My belly did not go back flat. Stretch a balloon to hold over 14 lbs of baby at one time and see if it goes back to the original size. NOT!

Makeup? What was that? Who had time to put mascara on? I was lucky to brush my teeth!

Pretty clothes? I couldn't get into a pair of prepregnancy jeans to save my life. I was still wearing maternity pants six months after they were born!
Yummy Mummy, my ass.

Times past, first thing in the morning I'd make the coffee and while it was perking, brush my toofies, brush my hair, wash my face, and then relax with a cup of coffee.

After the boys were born? Stumble into the kitchen to make coffee, go check on screaming baby, put toothpaste on the toothbrush, go check on other screaming baby. Turn the fauccet on to wash face, hear strange gurgling sounds in nursery, run back in there to see, start back to the bathroom, both babies start screaming when you leave, turn around, cuddle both babies until they finally go back to sleep, stumble into the kitchen, pour a cup of coffee...

Only to find you forgot to put coffee grounds in the filter.

And that my friends is Dummy Mummy Syndrome.

And I got it times two!

Welcome to my life with twins...

Shame on me!

I haven't posted in a year and a half!

Here's an update.

I retired from the Air Force and moved back home. I live across the street from my mom and my brother. I have a new job as a customer service rep for a paper company in Tuscaloosa, AL. I stay busy chasing after two very active 2.5 year olds who do not seem to understand what sleep is. I make my jewelry and sell vintage items to support their pull-up and clothing habit. I finally sit down every evening after they have gone to bed, exhausted and yet content.

I wouldn't change a thing!

It has been a while!

It has been a while since I posted...shame on me!

I've started an online business. Check me out at VintageTreasures! And my new blog here!

Want to know the latest on Mick and Mack?

Well Mick took his first steps on 30 Jan! Mack still prefers to be carried around so he either crawls or is carried. Mack, however, loves to climb! On 31 Jan he climbed onto the futon all by himself! Then he couldn't get down and that presented a dilemma for him. LOL

Their first birthday is coming up on Valentine's Day. It's so hard to believe that they are almost one. Even more hard to believe is the fact that we survived the first year! There were many many times when I didn't know how we were going to get through the day but we managed. They have grown so beautifully and they are so very different yet so very alike at the same time. It's amazing and an absolute joy to watch them grow every day!

They each have 8 teeth, 4 on top and 4 on bottom. They are teething some more so they've been a wee bit cranky lately.

But I don't mind. They are my heart after all.

Enough is enough

Is there anything available for sale in the USA that was NOT made in China?

I don't even know what to buy my boys for Christmas because it may be recalled.

Enough is enough.

Quit outsourcing and bring the businesses back to the US.